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Writer's pictureShannon N Martin, LPC

Surviving Mean Girl Mayhem: How to Overcome and Protect Yourself from Workplace Bullying

Rise Up & Don't Let Them Diminish Your Shine



Workplace bullying is a serious issue that can affect anyone, but women tend to be disproportionately affected. There are many reasons why some women engage in bullying behavior in the workplace. Some may feel threatened by a colleague's skills or accomplishments, while others may use bullying as a way to establish dominance or assert their authority. Whatever the reason, it is important to recognize that workplace bullying can have serious consequences for both the victim and the organization as a whole. It can lead to decreased job satisfaction, lower productivity, and even physical and emotional health problems. Workplace bullying can take many forms, from verbal abuse and exclusion to physical intimidation and sabotage. There is a clear link between children who engage in bullying behavior and adults who continue to bully in the workplace. Research has shown that children who bully are more likely to engage in aggressive and controlling behavior in adulthood, and may struggle with interpersonal relationships and conflict resolution skills. This can translate to the workplace, where adult bullies may use intimidation, manipulation, or verbal abuse to exert power over their colleagues. No one should have to put up with this type of behavior at work, and there are steps you can take to protect yourself.


Step 1: Recognize the Signs of Workplace Bullying


The first step in protecting yourself from workplace bullies is to recognize the signs of bullying behavior. Some common signs include:


Verbal abuse: Insults, name-calling, and belittling comments.

Exclusion: Being left out of meetings, not being invited to participate in group projects, or being intentionally isolated from your colleagues.

Physical intimidation: Threats of physical harm, aggressive body language, or invading personal space.

Sabotage: Deliberately undermining your work, spreading rumors or gossip, or taking credit for your accomplishments.

If you experience any of these behaviors, it's important to document them.


Step 2: Document the Occurrences


Documenting the occurrences of workplace bullying can help you build a case if you decide to report the behavior to your supervisor or HR. Keep a record of the date and time of the incident, the details of what happened, and any witnesses who were present. If there are any emails or messages related to the incident, be sure to save them as well. Keeping a record of these incidents can help you remember important details and provide evidence if needed.


Step 3: Confront the Bully


If you feel safe doing so, confronting the bully can be an effective way to put an end to their behavior. Be firm and clear about how their behavior is affecting you and ask them to stop. Make sure to stay calm and avoid getting emotional, as this can escalate the situation. If you're uncomfortable confronting the bully directly, consider speaking to your supervisor or HR representative instead.



Step 4: Report the Behavior


If the bullying continues, it's important to report the behavior to your supervisor or HR. This can be a difficult step to take, but it's important to remember that workplace bullying is not acceptable and can have serious consequences for both you and the company. When reporting the behavior, be sure to provide specific examples and any documentation you have. Your supervisor or HR representative should take the issue seriously and work to resolve it.





Step 5: Take Care of Yourself




Dealing with workplace bullying can be stressful and emotionally draining. It's important to take care of yourself. You can do this by practicing self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends and family. Seeking support from a therapist or counselor can also be beneficial. Remember that you are not alone, and there are resources available to help you through this difficult time. If you're looking for a safe space to talk, Let's Talk, I'll Listen Counseling Services is here to help. Our experienced therapists provide compassionate and non-judgmental support to help you navigate life's challenges. Whether you're struggling with bullying in the workplace, anxiety, depression, relationship issues, or anything in between, we are here to help you find the clarity and peace of mind you need to thrive. Let's talk – we're here to listen.



In Conclusion


Mean girls beware: Women deserve to feel safe and respected in their workplaces, and it is up to all of us to work towards creating a culture of respect and inclusion where bullying is not tolerated. Women supporting women is an important aspect of feminism, and by standing up to workplace bullies, you are helping to create a safer, more equitable workplace for all women. As Gloria Steinem once said, "The story of women's struggle for equality belongs to no single feminist nor to any one organization but to the collective efforts of all who care about human rights." Let's continue to support each other and work towards a more just and equitable world for all. While workplace bullying can be a difficult issue to deal with, it's important to remember that there are action steps you can take to protect yourself. In addition, workplaces must have clear policies and procedures in place to address workplace bullying and ensure a safe and respectful environment for all employees. By addressing bullying behavior in the workplace, we can work towards breaking the cycle of bullying and promoting a culture of respect and inclusivity.


References


Namie, G., & Namie, R. (2009). The bully at work: What you can do to stop the hurt and reclaim your dignity on the job. Sourcebooks, Inc.


Tracy, S. J., & Lutgen-Sandvik, P. (2006). Bullying in the US workplace: Normative and process perspectives. Journal of Organizational Behavior, 27(4), 467-487.


National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health. (2014). Workplace violence prevention strategies and research needs. US Department of Health and Human Services, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.


Einarsen, S., Hoel, H., & Notelaers, G. (2009). Measuring exposure to bullying and harassment at work: Validity, factor structure and psychometric properties of the Negative Acts Questionnaire-Revised. Work & Stress, 23(1), 24-44.


Lutgen-Sandvik, P., Tracy, S. J., & Alberts, J. K. (2007). Burned by bullying in the American workplace: Prevalence, perception, degree, and impact. Journal of Management Studies, 44(6), 837-862.


Zapf, D., Einarsen, S., Vartia, M., & Matthiesen, S. B. (2011). Individual antecedents of bullying: Victims and perpetrators. In Bullying and harassment in the workplace: Developments in theory, research, and practice (pp. 177-200). CRC Press.




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